Sometimes all of us feel that its really just too hard and nothing that we really want, nothing that would make us sing and dance for joy will ever happen for us.
All of us experience times like this. Usually when we have a picture in our head of how we want it to happen, and our lives do not resemble the picture. At this time there is a great disconnect between how our ego wants to see our lives working and how the divine plan is unfolding for us.
Yes sometimes what we are visioning is really cool, and yes it could even be part of our divine plan.
However it may be that we are too attached to the outcome, too attached to it happening, without any belief that the Divine will ultimately look after us if we let go and let God.
Easier said than done, I know you are saying. Yes it is easier said than done. But truly when you can really vision with passion and love, (holding your dearest wish in your heart) and then knowing that you will survive and thrive if it does not happen. This is called not being attached.
I remember many years ago really wanting a job. It wasn't just any job. It was the job that I dreamed about, visioned and really knew it was my destiny. sounds like a big rap doesn't it. Well it was that big deal for me.
After applying I was granted an interview. And then for two days before the interview I had a massive migraine. The worst headache of my life. The night before the interview I went to see a healer friend of mine to get some help. I explained to her how I was feeling, probably cried a bit, I was in agony, and all she said to me was, "You have to let the job go". I nearly swore. Didn't she understand that this was my job, I was born to do this job, it was waiting there for me, my perfect job. I expressed all of this, and she looked away and then back at me and again said, "So let it go. That's the only way that the band of steel that is around your head will be released and you will have any chance of getting the job."
I was now really mad. I had no idea what she was talking about. No clue. She suggested that I take a trip to the beach. I was flabbergasted. What did she mean take a trip to the beach. I had a headache, and what was I going to do at the beach.
Anyway when my husband arrived to pick me up with my daughter Isabella, (who was three at the time), he thought a trip to the beach would be a good diversion, and help me to calm down. I was still very mad. So we drove to Palm Beach on Sydney's northern beaches. The furthest beach in fact.
When we arrived both Rob and Isabella went to the shop to get some afternoon tea and I wandered down to the sand and sat down staring out to sea. I stared and stared at the ocean and then the sky. Then back to the ocean, up at the sky. All the time cursing under my breath and really trying to understand what in hell this "letting go thing was about".The seagulls walked around me looking for food, and the waves rolled in. for at least half an hour I was completely mystified as to how any of this was helping me.
I glanced around and saw that Rob and Isabella were now sitting on the sea wall eating hot chips and drinking milk shakes. They looked so happy and content. I smiled it was such a great picture. Then I looked at the sky and it was so blue and big and majestic. And then I really saw the Ocean. The beauty and the power of nature right in front of me. And like a thunder strike I got it.
If I did not get this job tomorrow, there would still be moments in my life like this. There would still be Rob and Isabella my dear family who I adore, there would still be the sky and there would still be the Ocean. I would not die if I did not get the job. In fact many things would continue to be wonderful. Really wonderful.
It was such a brilliant and blinding moment of clarity. In fact a life lesson learned on Palm Beach.
Joyfully I let the job go. I knew in that instant that if the job were mine I would get it and if not, it was not where I was supposed to be.
In fact when I went to the interview the following day, all the people who liked me on the Board of this company were there. None of the ones that did not enjoy my work. And before I left the building I had been offered the position, which I took and loved for the following four and a half years.So how does it work for you? Do you have to let go of something in order for it to come back to you.
Does this come up for you. I am still learning to let go and let God. Each time I have a new vision, the same kind of deep attachment occurs until I catch myself out, and remember that by holding it that tightly I will keep it away from me faster than any other method. And that if I allow the vision or project or ultimate goal to breathe, and hold it lightly, and have faith that if it is mine it will come floating back to me when I least expect it.
Some very exciting things are bubbling away for the Peace Angels at the moment, but I am holding lightly and letting go and letting God.
How about you,
I dare you
Loads and loads of love
- Anandanetti
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